Here: The place that I call "Home"

Dear Rose,
There's this boy. Lets called him Megat. Megat is confused right now. No! Not about this sexuality. About everything and he needs help. He needs a person to hear him. I want to tell him that I'm here if he needs a human, an ear, a pair of ears to hear or all the senses that I got to listen to him. But I don't know if he able to accept me because I'm not that close to Megat. I don't think he's comfortable talking about his problems to me. Or I don't know if he wants my crazy point of view.

After all, in people's eyes, I'm just another girl who got everything she wishes for. A girl like me will never understand how the world works.

It's funny. People thought that I'm a problem-less child. A happy-go-lucky girl. A girl from Melaka who wants to be a director/writer but stuck in a teaching-training college. I know that the things that I've been through were not THE biggest problem of all the biggest problem in the world. In fact, it's a common thing among people these days.

I'm not a problem-less gal, people! I still have problems those are not related to academic. The difference between other people than me, I've been through these problems in my secondary school years. I put my past behind me. I don't really want to recite all the things that happened to me again. It's too painful. It's too painful to see his face with that face. It's too painful to see her face. It's to painful to open facebook sometimes. I'm glad that the pain is decreasing while I'm here.

Oh, note to myself: NOT EVERYONE LIKES YOU AND YOUR CRAZY HABITS!

I know, but why they don't accept my individuality! It's not like I wear a mini skirt, it's not like I freaking throw a cake on your freaking pretty face! Not everyone wants to be like you! Why can't I be a little bit different from others?!!! My mom let me! My Abah let me! My brothers and sister let me! It's just a texture difference! ugh... Oh some people are worst than me! Why do you have to attack me alone?!

Anyway, I still hold to my Principe: Carpe diem.

I don't want any little thing brings me down.

Love,
Sarah