December...

December,December,December...

I'm supposed to write this yesterday but wtv...

I used to look forward for December every year. But this year I don't want to look December. 

December means the last month of the year, it means the end of the year. No, I don't wan't 2009 to end; there are so MANY things to do, to solve, and to SAY!

I probably should look forward for December because my birthday is on 16th of December. I will be 16. I'm ready to be sixteen. I'm not ready to be a grown-up. I'm not ready for SPM. I'm not ready for the world out there. Last year, I used to think that I was older than I really was. 'An old soul lived in an adolescent body.' Yeah, I used to feel I was 100% confident of myself but I was wrong. I was so naïve back then. I felt like I was Ms.-know-it-all, but I am not. I’m still a kid. I’m still learning LIFE.

From the beginning of the year 2009, January 1^st, my life has had changed. Every little aspect of my life changed. I don’t know if anyone notices it, I don’t really enjoy like I used to. Yeah, I miss the old me. So carefree, no problem to think of except for study, marks, school. Even though, those were my only problems, I brushed the problems away. But I guess now I can’t but brush it away. It will come back. Again and again and again. Sometimes, I got tired of it. I need to get away from all of this shit. I NEED to get things done. But I can’t speak up; I can’t stand up and tell everyone. I don’t know why I don’t have the guts to do it. I used to tell the truth all the time, even though it is blunt, I still am honest but I just kept hiding them. I just wish I have the strength and tell everything what’s on my mind. HAH! That guy/girl would be the a hella of a friend cause I rarely let out of my DEEP feelings to anyone…

 16th of December is also the date where I’ll be vacationing with my family to Egypt. Yeah, cool place…I am looking for it but there’s a slight feeling that hold me back. Idk… I’m worried. Idk about what, I just do. I just wish I could celebrate my birthday with all my friends because it is my SWEET 16. I’m going to miss my friends. I rarely mention them on my post. Nadh, Nana, Mira, Pari2 Surga, Facebook friends, Myspace friends, Twitter friends, other random friends, I love you and I miss you. Seriously, I love you and thank you for being my friend. I appreciate it.

I don’t why every time I write a blog lately, it must be an emotional one… I guess that’s what a blog functioned in my head, I guess. Wtvs..

Sigh, I love you guys…

Oh I want PRESENTS! I rarely got presents! :D